AM I THE ONLY PERSON WITH TERMINAL CANCER ? Need to talk.

sak

How on earth do you come to terms with terminal cancer?I desperately need to talk to someone who knows how I feel. Thanks,sak.

johnm · New User Joined: 11 Jan 2007 Posts: 2

My name is John. I am 45 and also a stage IV cancer patient. I have had thyroid cancer, colon cancer 8 cm tumor, liver mets 12 cm tumor, and brain mets 3 cm tumor. I was given 30 days to live and maybe 60 days with surgery. I sat for several days asking myself, how can I deal with this. I was referred to hospice and had a six year old to deal with. I would see news stories of young adults dying and felt guilty about asking for more time to live. I thought I could cry all day or take advantage of this. I gave my life to the lord. I took the time to make amends to those I had harmed and video taped myself for messages to my daughter as she grew up. I planned on having the best death possible. This was five years ago and I am now cancer free. Even though I was dying, I kept fighting. My advise is - give your life to the lord, be at peace, be prepared, and be well educated on your treatment choices. - John M

ElaineC · Regular Joined: 17 May 2005 Posts: 22 Location: UK

Hi sak, I also have terminal cancer. I had surgery for bowel cancer in January 2 years ago. In April 2005 tumours were found on my liver. I had a liver resection in May of that year followed by 6 months chemotherapy and a clear scan in November 2005. Unfortunately, a scan in June 2006 showed that the cancer has returned to my liver and the para-aortic lymph node.

At the moment I am undergoing chemotherapy of cetuximab, oxaliplatin and capecitabine with a view to prolonging my life, rather than curing me. People in my position live on average 2 years so I can roughly expect to die in the summer of next year.

I don't know how to come to terms with it. I am angry because I have always lived a fairly healthy life, for example I've been a vegetarian for 30 years and have never even tried a cigarette once in my life. I am frightened of what the future may hold and I am also having all sorts of problems with my partner who doesn't really accept that I am going to die. I also feel v. resentful when other people discuss their plans for the future. A future of which I am going to be deprived.

I hope we can talk to each other as I don't really have anyone in the same position as I am to whom I can talk confidentially.

mjd77 · New User Joined: 24 Apr 2007 Posts: 6

it f*cking sucks!!! i have good days and bad days...right now is bad. i'm 29 with stage 4 colon cancer. since march 2005, i've had months of chemo, and colon and liver resections. dec 2006, they found several inoperable tumors in my lungs. now more chemo, but "2nd" line or whatever- no oxyplatinum (sp?). i don't really go to my friends for support, they don't understand. i hardly talk about it at all, just say, stuff like, "yea, i have more chemo this week."
i visited one of my oldest friends in december, to see her baby that she named after me. after the plane ride, i caught a cold. months later, she berated me for being selfish and not thinking of others, because i could have gotten her baby sick. i don't talk to her anymore. my best friend is a resident anaestheseologist (sp?) in a hospital. she cried when i told her it had spread to my lungs. she doesn't return my phone calls and emails anymore.
i talk to my shrink. i take antidepressants.
maura

	Cancer Forums Forum Index -> Colon Cancer and Rectal Cancer Forum	All times are GMT - 5 Hours
Page 1 of 1

A website for discussions about any type of cancer, including lung cancer, breast cancer, mesothelioma, prostate cancer, laryngeal cancer, leukemia, lymphoma, multiple myeloma and others