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Cath125
New User
Joined: 29 Apr 2008
Posts: 2
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 Posted: Wed Apr 30, 2008 5:14 am Post subject: Alone |
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| Hi I'm new to this. I found out 2 weeks ago that my mum has stage IV colon cancer and has been told she has 18 months if she takes chemo. She is taking chemo so there's no problem there. Infact she has her first appointment at the hospital today. I am currently doing a phd and home is a plane journey away. I'm going home in 5 days. The time I've been here has been hell and I don't think I'm coping very well. I've arranged to move back home and study for there but that won't be happening for another month. Everyone seems to be avoiding wanting to talk about it. My boyfriend seems distant and unavailable and I can feel him panick when I mention my mum. My friends all look at me with a sympathy look (with their heads cocked to the side and a sad look on their face). I tried to talk to my brother and he just started talking about his work. I'm really worried about going home. I've been crying constantly and I'm worried the most about not being able to keep it together when I see my mum. I'm not sure what to say or how to act. I feel completely alone. Does anyone have any advice? |
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mimixtwo
Regular
Joined: 25 Apr 2008
Posts: 13
Location: ohio
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| Posted: Wed Apr 30, 2008 9:06 am Post subject: Re: Alone |
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Hi, Cath, I am Mimi, and i too am somewhat new to this. My husband was just diagnosed with head and neck cancer. I know what you are going through, I was trying to keep myself together, stay strong for my husband and its very hard, I also get the sad looks from family, and friends, My husband right now doesn't want to talk much about it, so here's what helps me deal with it. keep comming to this wonderful group of people, there is so much info from people like us, who are either have cancer, or someone close to them have it we are all here for the same thing, read even the things that may not pertain to your mother. I went to the lounge yesturday, and read the entry on jokes, I laughed so hard i cried, and that was something I despeatly needed to do. the other thing you could do if no one with you want to talk about it is write a journal or a blog, get it all out, In a private journal you can get as mad as you want, say whatever you want. I know with me, since his diagnosis, my mind has been going back in time with my husband, and family, and i write it down, memories are a wonderful thing, and by putting them on paper you can laugh, and smile at times, and cry too. I hope this helps you some till you can get back to your mom. You are in my thoughts and prayers.  |
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brainman
Site Admin
Joined: 13 Oct 2005
Posts: 3319
Location: Tennessee
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| Posted: Wed Apr 30, 2008 10:48 am Post subject: Re: Alone |
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Dear Cath, I am so sorry about your mother's cancer and the sadness that it is bringing into your life and the life of your family. You are not alone on the terrible journey. Most of us have been in very similar situations. Please, be reassured in the knowledge that this forum is here for you to answer any questions and to provide the support that you need.
You and your mother are in my thoughts and prayers.
_________________
Jim
Site Administrator and long-term cancer survivor
1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendoglioma grade 3, same location.
My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
My Story Part 2: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=8029
Blog http://jimhawkinsport.blogspot.com/ |
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ksplat
Moderator
Joined: 26 Apr 2007
Posts: 426
Location: Brisbane, Australia
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| Posted: Wed Apr 30, 2008 5:38 pm Post subject: Re: Alone |
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Dear Cath
I am sorry to hear about your Mother's Cancer. I can fully appreciate the place you're in at the moment. I have a Bro with a brain tumour.
You are not alone & I'm so glad you found this forum. It has been a catalyst & support to me since my Bro's diagnosis & you can come here anytime & "offload" your concerns. We are a great community of support, comfort & love & you can talk here about anything!
I hope the transition to moving home is trouble free & I know once you're back there you will feel much better & less stressed.
There are so many treatments available for cancer now & a positive energy is essential in the healing process. You will be the best medicine for your Mother as she undergoes her treatment.
My prayers & thoughts are with you.
Cheers, Angie.
_________________
Brother has GBMIV
Diagnosed Feb 07
46 Yrs young!
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=19227
"Without Faith We Have Nothing" |
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Darwin
Experienced user
Joined: 11 Feb 2008
Posts: 82
Location: Darwin Australia
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| Posted: Fri May 02, 2008 7:37 pm Post subject: Re: Alone |
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Dear Cath
Srry to hear about your Mum's cancer. Your presence will bring great comfort to her and it will give you time to just be with your Mum for some quality time. This forum is wonderful. It is so informative but more than that there are so many kind, understanding and caring people here. They have helped me more than words can express. I have found more practical information here than I ever got from the Oncologist and hospital.
Safe trip back home and best wishes with that PhD, that brings back memories
Hugs
Dorothy
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Ex husband's diagnosis was March 2006, stage IV bowel cancer with met to liver and lungs. Current chemo treatment folfiri + avastin +erbitux (cetuximab) every two weeks. |
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Cath125
New User
Joined: 29 Apr 2008
Posts: 2
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| Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 8:15 pm Post subject: Re: Alone |
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| Thanks so much guys. My time back home was weird to say the least. It was kind of normal and kind of not even nearly normal. Thanks for your messages of support. I will definitely be using this site regularly |
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