mom just diagnosed

pooh · New User Joined: 15 Jul 2007 Posts: 7

Hi, I.m new here ,but I figured I needed to start somewhere.My mom was just dx 1 month ago with pc.The doctors thougt she had a gallbladder issue.When I finally took her to the er they delivered the blow....pancreatic,liver& lung cancer.Talk about being devastated!!!!Ive read many of your stories & each one is a heartbreaker.Ican't believe how quickly she is going down hill.She barely eats, can't hold anything down,can't urinate or have a bowel movment.I know it,s from the pain medication.She sleeps constantly.Although she says she isn't in pain only at night.She is currently on the fentenayl patch25 mgs.& takes oxycodone for pain.She keeps asking me when she will get better.She knows the full grim outlook,but I feel bad I can't ginve her the answere she needs.She said she hopes to die now if this the way she is going to be.My question is ...if the doctor gave her 2 moths to live,will there be more specific things that will happen before she actually leaves us??I guess there is no way in knowing when a person will go,I just pray after reading all of your posts it wiil be quick.Mom is 70 & I was praying she'd make it to her birthday in Sept.,She teied 2 stints of chemo but it was hopeless,She had to many side effects.I am the youngest out of 6 kids & I cant beieve that I am going to lose my"Bestfriend"My dad died 11 years ago ,but somehow yhat was easier than this. sorry for rambling on,guess I just needed to talk. thanks pooh

Cassiel240 · Regular Joined: 13 Dec 2006 Posts: 12

I'm so sorry about your mom. That first month or two after my own mom was diagnosed was really, really hard. It's difficult to know what to expect or what to do. Each person's experience with cancer can be so different, as I'm sure you've found. We've been really blessed that our experience hasn't been so terrible, relatively speaking.

One thing I would urge you, though, is that if she is still in pain, make sure her doctor knows about it. Our doctors have made it very clear to us that there is no reason for our mom to be in pain when there are such effective medications available. Also, if you haven't looked into hospice care already, I really recommend you do it. We haven't had to rely on them yet, but the hospice workers have been so helpful in simply letting us know our options and the resources available.

If you ever want to talk, feel free to email me.
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