Help Please

megstop · New User Joined: 11 Mar 2007 Posts: 1

My mum does not want to go through w/ the Chemo. She is too concerned about the hairloss. We tried looking for a wig, but she said they all made her look freaky. I want her to go through w/ it what should I do? Help apperciated.

cardoso · Guest

Tell her nobody likes a corpse, even one with a nice hairdo. She's acting selfish and stupid, tell her to stop a little and THINK about it. Her life is so shallow and meaningless that a bunch of hair worths more to her?

Don't try to reason, she's in denial, she needs a ton of bricks on her head. Hundreds of thousands of people are dying right now because they CAN'T have chemo, because it's too expensive and she does not want it because of her HAIR?

fatherson · Regular Joined: 05 Jan 2007 Posts: 29 Location: Nottingham

[quote="cardoso"]Tell her nobody likes a corpse, even one with a nice hairdo. She's acting selfish and stupid, tell her to stop a little and THINK about it. Her life is so shallow and meaningless that a bunch of hair worths more to her?

Don't try to reason, she's in denial, she needs a ton of bricks on her head. Hundreds of thousands of people are dying right now because they CAN'T have chemo, because it's too expensive and she does not want it because of her HAIR?[/quote]

Dont be so harsh, ok i understand what your saying but to say shes selfish?
Its her choice, maybe shes just afraid?..try your best to reason with her, prehaps its just a snap reaction to the fact she needs chemo, maybe she will come around with a good gentle talk. People deal with things, all things, very differently...i wish my dad could of had that chance but if he didnt want to go through with it...as much as it would have hurt me...its his choice.
I wish you luck and hope you can resolve it, present her with the facts but try not to be too mad with her, shes going through a million feelings right now.x
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Vee Smith · Moderator Joined: 12 Feb 2006 Posts: 796 Location: UK

[quote="megstop"]My mum does not want to go through w/ the Chemo. She is too concerned about the hairloss. We tried looking for a wig, but she said they all made her look freaky. I want her to go through w/ it what should I do? Help apperciated.[/quote]

If all she is worried about is her looks, then suggest she (a) has her hair cut really short - lots of women are surprised by how good they look with short hair; hair will grow back so it's not permanent; and (b) have a look at how many woman have very short hair.

My feeling is that this is a diversionary tactic and that really she's deeply scared by her diagnosis and by the warnings you always get with advice on treatment. But hairloss is cosmetic - it can be covered temporarily and hair grows back afterwards. Try to persuade/encourage her to ask the clinic for a contact to talk with. Most have some kind of support group. She needs to talk to people who have been through this and come out the other side. Perhaps you can ask around and see if there is anyone local. Look out for magazine with articles about chemo treatments and how to deal with them, and leave them on the kitchen table.

Whatever you do, don't nag at her. Nothing is more distressing when in this stage than to feel under pressure.

fatherson · Regular Joined: 05 Jan 2007 Posts: 29 Location: Nottingham

Good advice vee smith. Thats what i was getting at, although not as articulate as you! Very Happy

Good luck megstop, wish you and your mom well.x
_________________
Time is a virtue, spend it wisely.

ahib0205 · New User Joined: 15 Mar 2007 Posts: 5

Slow talk or discuss is more important things then other!

http://capguide.blogspot.com/

louj · New User Joined: 30 Mar 2007 Posts: 5

I think you can go talk it through with her that you don't want to lose her. There ways you can make chemotherapy heal better by trying out Neulasta. You can consider this product up for your mom if you like. Hope she gets better! God bless!
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Cancer is very hard to deal with. I know that the victims and their family needs all the help they can get in times of crisis. Please take a look of this site if you have time. It might be of help to you. www.neulastainfo.com/cost-of-neulasta/

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