Please anyone if you have any advice please help...

Annick · New User Joined: 22 Nov 2006 Posts: 1

Hello Everyone!

Two months ago my father was diagnosed with Prostate Cancer. He just went through the radical prostectomy on November 10 and was actually able to come back home from the hospital on the 14th. But he had to have a catheter with him for the next two weeks after the surgery. When they finally removed the catheter he now has incontinence and his urine leaks and he has to wear adult diapers. He's very discouraged. And as a daughter seeing him like this hurts. Is there any advice that anyone can give me? He works on his kengle excersises, but he is very impatient. He is able to pee though and stop his stream Sad

of urine and then pee again. The doctor told him that that was a good sign. However like i said he wishes to have his control back. Does anyone know how long it takes for him to have some improvement. He says when he stands up and walks around he often leaks and can go through a lot of diapers in one day and because of this his spirits are very low. I'm saddened and i wish my dad can be himself again. Any words of encouragement would be very very appreciated. Thank you all and God bless.

Hawk · Regular Joined: 22 Nov 2006 Posts: 47

Tell him that he may very well get 100% control back (I did) but it will be progressive over weeks and months. Some days he will have set backs and leak a bit but more he will then progrss on. If he can stop a stream a couple weeks after surgery he will be fine if he does LOTS of kegal exercises. He should try to advance to a "male Pad" it will help his ego and force more control than a diaper. Next step is to cut a male pad in half to make it shorter and make two out of one.

Best wishes and bless you for being the daughter you are.

johnw100

It's very early days, and there is no real time frame:

Many say they are back to normal or showing improvement after 6 weeks, but it can sometimes take longer.

In any event, we can't expect great things in a couple of weeks, and he is doing fairly well.

ugbandtulsa · Regular Joined: 28 Nov 2006 Posts: 11

I understand your frustration. I would say at this point, you must look at the alternative. My father chose not to have the operation at age 65. Now, at 77, his PSA is 60, down from 250 by using chemo. I think if he had to do it all over again, he might have had the radical. But, at the time, the surgery was very rough, and there was virtually 0 chance of a total recovery. Now, quite a few doctors are pretty good at it, so I'd say your father needs to re-evaluate the way he looks at it.

I know he's bummed about it, but the flip side is letting the cancer sit and eventually spread (which it will), and get him later in life. So, a little pee problem is better than having to go through chemo and such. Overall, in total, the quality of life is much better than being sick all the time.

Hope that helps,

Mike

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