ADOLENT LYMPHOMA

umbleweed · Regular Joined: 22 Nov 2007 Posts: 25

I first discovered a lymph node on the right side of my neck almost five years ago when i was 16 years old (i'm almost 21) after having a sore throat and ulcers on my tonsils. I immediantley convinced myself i had cancer, and for the past 5 years i have lived in fear and depression of death but too scared to visit a doctor. I developed the same sized lymph node in the same area on the left side about 2-3 months afterwards. I have had discomfort in my throat since and the feeling of something stuck in my throat, the annoyance is intermittent, and generally when ive smoked allot i get the discomfort (noting that the lymph nodes never change in size, and havent since i first discovered them). They are movable, but they dont feel soft, they are firm and non tender. They do not hurt.

Almost a 11 months ago i fell ill with a what i presume was a viral infection from which i developed permenent ailments which have deverstated my teenage life to say the least.. Cloudy vision, Disorientated, Depersonalized, Localized dull right-sided headaches, Anscioria (pupil size difference), Aching legs, muscles. Extreme fatigue (which has now passed), Nightsweats (dont get these anymore and i sleep with all my clothes on because im so self-concious about my weight now i cant even look at my legs), Day sweats (stopped now summer is over), Malayise, Sensitivety to light, The strangest thing is i noticed some of these symptoms when i gradually started having a change in hangovers (depersonilization, blurryness, confusion, sweating etc) the morning after drinking alcohol but the next day i would be normal its almost asif these symptoms have became permenent... I am 100% convinced i have a adolent lymphoma which has secondary spread to my brain there isnt any other disease or problem i can find which could relate. Oh did i mention weight loss... I havent a clue what my previous "normal" weight was. But when i fell i'll i must of lost a serious ammount of weight because my legs and arms are just bones and horrible viens popping out everywhere all over my hands and my i can even see them in my fingers. Its hard to tell im a naturally skinny person and ive always found it hard to gain weight. So loosing weight is the worst thing that could possibly happen to me physically.

Because of my constant worry of cancer for the past 5 years i began drinking very heavily. Infact alcohol for the past 5 years has ruined allot of my life. Trouble with the law, trouble with family, friends etc. I also had a patch of about a year taking anphetemines and extacy which i also took over the top. I dont really like to share that kind of information because people tend to just relate my problems to that. Which i really dont think it is, I cant even drink alcohol anymore. 4-5 bottles of beer and i'll wake up feeling like its my last day on earth. It makes my symptoms 100 times worse and most of time i pick up a nasty cold.

I have being visiting doctors for around 6 months, i have had bloodtests which came back normal. I have had 5 doctors tell me its all anxiety and my lymph nodes are "normal" dispite the fact ive being telling them its not anxiety and that my lymph nodes are not "normal" and that its absurd that they can even make that kind of evaluation without any further testing disregarding every concern i have about the effectiveness of lymphoma detection with blood-tests.

A month ago i finally found a half-decent doctor who actually listens to me. He is still in the frame of mind that there isnt anything seriously wrong, But i think he is finally realising it atleast isnt anxiety. I'm due to see a ENT doctor very soon which im looking forward to for many reasons, obviously to have a professional opinion from a specialist, hopefully some answers to whats going on, but mainly to face the fears ive bottled up for the past 5 years.

Has anyone had a similar experience with the findings of a lymphoma? Any comments would be great. Ive got to say ive just had the worst year of my entire life i havent felt myself for almost a year and its diliberating, i try to be strong but im generally a very weak and nervous person when it comes to this kind of stuff. I dont think i could handle a confirmed diagnosis of cancer. I wouldnt even hack the chemo with my weight.

I guess ive told myself for 5 years id be getting ill pretty soon and my "wish" has came true.... What the hell is the point in living if you feel like this all the time.

Well sorry for the length.
Peace to you all
umbleweed.

Tuesdayk · Posted: Fri Nov 23, 2007 5:32 pm Post subject: Re: ADOLENT LYMPHOMA

I've noticed I've had the same problems with the doctors.
This is the second time my lymph nodes in my pelvic area have become inflamed and caused me great pain. (summer they were 11 mm now they are 23 mm). They just sent me to a gastrologist thinking its IBS or something and on Wed I had a colonoscopy. We should be getting results today. Mom says if we dont find anything here we are going to a OBGYN specialist now. No one seems to listen to me when I say I want to go to a oncologist. Of course that reason is probably because A. we are on insurance and its hard too or B. Im only 16 years old. =(

face10101010145 · New User Joined: 07 Jan 2008 Posts: 4

I noticed that I was becoming fatigued and getting night sweats at 16, I went to my doctor and 8 months later at the age of 17 I am cured. Personally I think it's important to find a doctor who is willing to believe you immediately and send you for tests. It was an X-ray that identified the lymphoma in my chest and spleen, perhaps something along these lines may help you.

Hope this helps.

umbleweed · Regular Joined: 22 Nov 2007 Posts: 25

Thought i would update my story.

Went to see a ENT specialist who ordered a Ultrasound scan of the neck the report of the ultrasound says i have small multiple lymph nodes in the level V of the neck. they are quite small lymph nodes and they appear to be reactive according to the scans.

When i got these results he requested a chest x-ray and asked that i get tested for hep A, B, C. And HIV. I'm awaiting a FNA when i go back for my chest x-ray results.

Problems still persist and i feel awful every day. Ive stopped tracking my weight because everytime i step on the scales my heart drops in panic. Ive developed terrible pain in the lower sides of what feels like my back, I'm going to mention this to my GP next visit. Blood tests for hiv etc came back all negetive the other day (phew).

brainman · Posted: Sat Feb 02, 2008 2:15 pm Post subject: Re: ADOLENT LYMPHOMA

Hi umbleweed. I am glad that the tests all came back negative even though that still leaves you in the dark about the cause of your problems. At least your medical team is working.

Best wishes.
_________________
Jim
Site Administrator and long-term cancer survivor
1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendoglioma grade 3, same location.
My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
My Story Part 2: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=8029
Blog http://jimhawkinsport.blogspot.com/

umbleweed · Regular Joined: 22 Nov 2007 Posts: 25

Thanks for the reply brainman. Sometimes i think not knowing whats wrong with me is scarier than being told i do have something bad. In a way i'm actually disapointed that they havent found something conclusive yet as strange as that may seem.

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